Don’t Call Me Shy
Welcome to Don’t Call Me Shy, a forum for parents, teachers, and shy adults, where we take a brand new look at shyness. Here you will discover a very definite method to help shy individuals achieve social success.
Laurie Adelman
B.S.N., M.S. Family Health/Health Education
The author
    Laurie Adelman is a nurse and health educator, a shyness life coach, and a child advocate who is passionately devoted to teaching parents and teachers how to interact with shy children in a way which brings out the child’s social best.
Note: These techniques bring out the social best in shy adults too!
Let me introduce myself
Featured on:
The Today Show
News 12 In Our Schools
One-On-One with Steve Adubato
Hi. I’m Laurie Adelman.

  For 25 years, as a nurse and health educator – and being shy myself - I’ve researched shyness and spoken with hundreds of shy children and shy adults.

  It took me a long time…and many failed social attempts…to realize that there was a direct connection between the beliefs I had about myself and how I behaved.

  Because of my personal experiences, and the work I’ve done with other shy individuals, I can help you avoid the things that don’t help - and introduce you to a method that does.

  You’ve probably heard that shy individuals should “put themselves out there” or “push themselves.” The truth is that it doesn’t work to attempt to act social…if you continue to identify yourself as shy.

  I have the tools to bring out your shy child’s social ability…and if you are a shy adult, I can teach you how to change your thinking in ways that will change your life!

  In my book called Don’t Call Me Shy I take parents of shy children, and shy adults, through a step-by-step process that helps shy individuals change their mind-set from “I can’t because I’m shy” to “I CAN be social if I try.”

  As a Shyness Coach I work with parents of shy children over the phone (so it doesn’t matter where you live) to help you encourage social ability and high self-esteem in your child. I teach you…so that you can help your child. For motivated shy adults, I help you change those long-held beliefs about yourself that have been preventing you from comfortably interacting with others.

  I am not about “magical” overnight changes - or changing personality. I am about helping shy individuals feel really good about themselves…leading to a sense of social comfort that they never thought possible.

  Come and explore my website…and always know that I am here to help you any way that I can. Please feel free to write to me ( as the following people did…

  What people said about Don’t Call Me Shy…
  “Unlike many books that are hard to understand and put into everyday life, I use your words and advice every day. My son goes to school now with confidence and has made his first friend.”

  “I always thought that I had to force myself into social situations and just do it. From your book I learned how my thinking was working against me. Because the more I pushed myself, the more uncomfortable I felt.”

  “Now that I have incorporated the Don’t Call Me Shy Ready, Set, Go program I feel more confident than I have ever felt before and I find that I am able to participate and speak to people with more comfort and less anxiety this time.”

  “For the very first time, my daughter said ‘hello’ to a neighbor in a loud and clear voice. I am so proud of her.”

  “The Social Skill Builders chapter helped me make it fun for my daughter to learn how to be more social without even realizing she was learning. Ashley made her first phone call to a friend today and it went very well.”

  What people said about Shyness Coaching…
  “All I can say is thank you for finally giving me something that I can do that actually makes a difference in my child’s behavior and comfort level. My daughter is blossoming with your method and I feel so much more sure of myself as her mother.”

  “I don’t call my son ‘shy’ anymore and he has come such a long way. He loves his karate class and speaks out with confidence.”

  “Your guidance helped me change some ideas about myself that I held onto for a very long time. At 31 years old I am finally discovering that I have the ability to interact with others and I am slowly working on making some real changes in my thinking.”

  “Thanks for being the shoulder that I could cry on (and you know, I cried plenty). You have showed me how to appreciate my child for who she is and our home is a much happier place. And the most wonderful thing is how much more sure of herself my daughter is becoming.”

I was a shy child
    Many years have passed yet I still vividly recall how lonely I felt growing up. People knew me as shy sweet Laurie. My mother, who loved me dearly, was trying to help when she repeatedly told me “stop being shy and go play.” And because I couldn’t, those well-meaning suggestions only served to let me know, over and over again, what a social failure I was.
   One day my high school teacher, probably thinking that he was making a harmless joke, warned the class “you have to keep your eyes on the shy ones – right Laurie?” While the class laughed and stared, a quiet determination grew deep inside of me. I gained a strength that I didn’t know I had. From that day on, I began to parent myself, and very slowly, a brand new Laurie emerged.
    I feel tremendous emotion as I share these memories because I know that countless shy children are going through the same pain today. I know how tough it is growing up shy and I also know how challenging it is to be the parent of a shy child because I have a shy child of my own.
    As a parent, I made a conscious decision to raise
my daughter Becky very differently from how I was raised. Taking my personal experiences from childhood, and knowledge gained from interviews with hundreds of parents, teachers, and shy children and adults, I developed a technique which brings out the social best in those who are shy. I helped my Becky, through a slow and gentle process, to come to the realization that she had the ability to behave in a social manner. She never identified herself as shy and did not become so.
    I have come to realize that how we speak to ourselves determines how we feel – and behave. If you can help your child change her inner self-talk from “I CAN’T because I am shy” to “I CAN be social if I try,” you help your child take the first step towards social comfort. Parents and teachers, through your words and actions you exert a tremendous influence upon children and help them define who they are and what they are capable.
    I have advised parents, teachers, and shy adults for years using my techniques. I started this website because I want to provide this information in a more formal, organized way. Not one more day should go by where a shy child or adult unnecessarily feels the pain of shyness and/or a parent and teacher feels helpless to help them because they have not been given the proper tools. I have the tools and I want to share them with you.
Order my newsletter
    If you or your child is like me, being shy makes you feel uncomfortable, lonely, and frustrated. I want to help you avoid the mistakes I made - and teach you the technique that transforms shy behavior into social comfort.

    Because the demand for my coaching is greater than I’m able to fill, and new coaching clients have to wait months until I have an available opening, I’m offering Your Year To Shine; a series of 12 monthly newsletters that you receive each month for an entire year. Your Year To Shine makes my coaching techniques immediately available to everyone who wants them.  (Learn More...)

              -Laurie Adelman
Don’t Call Me Shy...
In Bookstores 
September 1, 2007
Call 1-800-864-1648